| John Thatcher Longley: Yo!
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| Lars: John.
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| JTL: What’s up?
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| Lars: Yo, I’m going to put the song about your house on The album. |
| Is that cool?
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| JTL: Uh… Yeah, I just don’t want to have any, like,
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| Stalkers knowing my name, like my full name.
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| Do you think it’s cool?
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| Lars: We’ll keep it on the DL. |
| We’re going to spell it In the lyrics different than it is.
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| JTL: Alright, that’s cool, yeah, whatever.
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| My drummer has the messiest house in New Jersey
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| My drummer has the messiest house in New Jersey
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| CHORUS
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| John Thatcher Longley — clean up your house
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| John Thatcher Longley — clean up your house
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| My drummer has the messiest house in New Jersey
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| My drummer has the messiest house in New Jersey
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| My drummer has a messy house
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| And that is what this song’s about
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| As I write these rhymes I’m starting to doubt
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| This kid will ever take the garbage out
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| The living room is full of cans
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| The ping-pong table barely stands
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| I guess he’s too busy with other demands
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| Like Game Cube and listening to pop punk bands
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| There’s pizza boxes stacked in the living room
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| No mops, no brooms, and no vacuums
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| Open the fridge and you might see
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| Half a Mr. Pibb and some moldy cheese
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| Upstairs the toilet barely works
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| That’s just one of the many perks
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| Last time it took me half an hour
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| To figure out how to work his upstairs shower
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| CHORUS
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| His house makes me think about
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| All the things in life you can live without
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| LIke Internet, pens, tables and chairs
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| There’s mail stacked randomly on the stairs
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| The bathroom door’s falling off
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| I went to the attic and started to cough
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| But every time a tour rolls by, you know we’ll stay at Laurel Drive
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| CHORUS
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| John Thatcher Longley — clean up your house
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| John Thatcher Longley — clean up your house
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| John Thatcher Longley — clean up your house
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| John Thatcher Longley — clean up your house
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| Lars: I mean, does it make you mad at all?
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| JTL: No, no, I think it’s hilarious.
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| Lars: Alright cool, I just wanted to make sure it was
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| Cool.
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| My drummer has a messy house,
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| And that is what this song’s about. |