Ohh… What a bloody, bloody foggy night
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Oh god yes
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Oh, I will have a brandy, yes, thank you
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Cheers
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Do you know I, I heard from the commons that they’re thinking of giving women
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the vote?
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-laughter-
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I wouldn’t give women a goat! |
Bloody harlots!
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Yes, yes, well I don’t think Jack the Ripper is that, that bad a thing really
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Not really, no
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Between you and me
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And what of Professor Elemental? |
What of him?
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That damned fool? |
Don’t ask! |
Last thing I heard, he was, making some kind of
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contraption to turn, jam into a new fuel, nearly set fire to the house of
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commons
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Oh lord… I, I heard he went to the north pole, wearing only his top hat,
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and tried to catch penguins to use as servants!
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Oh, doesn’t surprise me. |
Yes, yes I even hear tell he’s been trying to fly like
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some kind of foppish man-bird!
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-laughter-
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That damned orangutan of his is assisting him to make some sort of winged
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contraption
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Oh, well after what happened to his last assistants, I’m not surprised he’s
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resorted to primates
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That’s him!
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Oh no, no…
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Oh god, he’s brought that damned monkey in…
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Oh what’s he wearing?
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Oh, oh look what he’s doing to the butler…
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>: «No Geoffrey»
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Why is he even a member of this gentleman’s club…
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I don’t know how he does it…
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Right right, stay down, stay down…
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I am reading my paper
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Gentlemen, gentlemen! |
Hello! |
Good to see you all!
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Oh, don’t mind Geoffr… Geoffrey get down from there!
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Oh I’m so terribly sorry…
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I’ll wager you haven’t heard about my new invention?
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No? |
I’m going to fly gentlemen! |
Like a bird through the sky!
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Would you care for some snuff?
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I just can’t get enough
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Trust you’re here for the tour
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Well explore if you must
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I’ll direct through trap door
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To many an oddity
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Bought from the foreigners
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Out in the colonies
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Ideas, got a headful
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One man penny dreadful
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The marvelous, eccentric, Professor Elemental
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The year’s 1880, and the race for the sky
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Is what every inventor, is aching to find
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In search of adventure
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With a well waxed moustache
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And a splendid top hat
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I’ll have the last laugh
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Hard graft, dark arts
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And I’ve crafted an ark
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And I’ve studied the stars, on parchments of the past
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I’m mastering my destiny
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Constant creation
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Awaiting patiently, for a nation’s adulation
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I’m making a promise, creating a thing
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To take to the air, on mechanical wings!
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In this steam-room for months
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Lifting these lumps
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Pistons and pumps
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Shift and then shunt
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Aided by my patient, companion by my side
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A pet orangutan with a mechanical eye
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But that’s by-the-by
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A whole other story
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Today I will fly in my moment of glory
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Well dressed
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My 'tache is waxed to perfection
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Unveiling my best and my grandest invention
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Time to cause scandal
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A ship of oak pannels
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Balloons, wings, a stove
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Ropes and brass handles
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It’s loud, yet serene
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The crowd gave a scream
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I launch to the sky above houses and streams
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Soaring past clouds beyond towns in between
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And I’m shouting so proudly
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Announced on the scene
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So God save The Queen!
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Cause everything is possible
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For a man in a top hat
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With a monkey, with a monacle!
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Ohh, this is the life, eh Geoffrey?
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Flying through the sky, just me and my monkey
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Take the wheel while I have a piece of cake
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If a gentleman is known
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By the state of his dwelling
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Let’s say that my quarters
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Are really quite telling
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Most men don’t want it badly enough
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From the opium dens
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To the travellers club
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Good christ we’re too high!
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Monkey steer from the sky
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Thank the lord that I brought my spare air supply
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Take care, dive soon
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Oh we’ll land on the moon
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Foolish ape, don’t try to spike the balloon with a spoon!
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You lunatic we’re doomed!
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This adventure is hurtling
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And crashing
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Into London’s town centre
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And swerving -inaudible-
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I deflate, I charter to land
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Oh I’m cursing my ape
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It’s not part of the plan
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I smash up Big Ben
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Crash the palace confused
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My ape takes the crown
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But the Queen’s not amused
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I’ve produced quite a mess
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But I’ll keep my mind clear
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Cause tomorrow I’ll have my next finest idea! |